How Can I Help?

Preface and Chapter 1

Caring for one another, we sometimes glimpse an essential quality of our being. We may be sitting alone, lost in self doubt or pity, when the phone rings with a call from a friend who’s really depressed. Instinctively, we come out of ourselves, just to be there with her and say a few reassuring words. When we are done, and a little comfort’s been shared, we put down the phone and feel a little more at home with ourselves. We’re reminded of who we really are and what we have to offer one another.  (Pg. 7)

Sometimes I help and sometimes I don’t…..look, you do the best you can. (P.9-11)

Almost immediately, certain biases rise to the surface and make us hesitant. (P12)

Chapter 2

Hundreds of times a day, we shift costumes to fit appropriate roles. This is the life of the separate self, moving through the world of “other.” (P. 21)

It’s not that I don’t care-I’m just sure you could find somebody better than me to do it. (P. 25)

The geese have no intention to cast their reflections. The lake has no mind to receive their image. (P. 41)

Chapter 3

Suffering

You heart goes out to them, goes out to them all. The pain of others gives rise to the desire to help, to comfort, to touch, to say I’m here, I’m here with you, I understand.” (P. 56)

Between the event to which we feel no personal connection and a tragedy that break our hearts, there is a vast range of affliction. (P. 56)

About suffering they were never wrong, the Old Masters: how well they understood, its human position; how it takes place while someone else is eating or opening a window or just walking dully along. (P. 60)

Chapter 4

The Listening Mind

Much of our capacity to help another depends upon our state of mind. (P. 93)

It’s playing it by ear, listening for the voice within. (P. 111)

When two people are at one in their innermost hearts, they shatter even the strength of iron or bronze. And when two people understand each other in their innermost hearts, their words are sweet and strong like the fragrance of orchids. (P. 114)

Early Conditioning? “They made me read Helper Rabbit every night until I was eight.” (P.125)

After all, if some of us are busy helpers there must be others under continuous pressure to be helped. (P. 134)

Chapter 6

There’s one thing I’ve learned in twenty five years or so of political organizing: People don’t like to be “should” upon. They’d rather discover than be told. (P157)

It takes the split second timing of the quiet mind, working in harmony with the open heart, to know just when and how to say “Hey!” to a potentially dangerous opponent. (P171)

The story that begins….

The train clanked and rattled through the suburbs….the laborer was sprawled on the seat, his head in the old man’s lap. The old man was softly stroking the filthy, matted hair. (P 167-170)

Chapter 7

“As our heart begins to close down, joy, and inspiration give way to apathy and resignation. There arises a range of emotions and responses we’ve come to call burnout.” (P 185)

 “In the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities. In the expert’s there are few.” (P 208)

“We play our part...and act…and burnout…and are helped or help ourselves to stand up again.” (P 210)

Chapter 8

O, that my priest’s robes were wide enough to gather up all of the suffering people in this floating world. (P 229)

Ultimately, on this journey, we simply become compassion, as a natural consequence of what we have seen or understood. (P 230)

We work on ourselves, then, in order to help others. And we help others as a vehicle for working on ourselves. (P 227)